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Stephen Fry has said that he feels sorry for straight men.

Hierophant
Hierophant Male
6 days ago
Because women don't like sex as much as men. The only reason women have sex with men is that sex is the price they are willing to pay for a relationship with a man, which is what they want.
He says women will deny it and say they love sex but, do they go around having it the way gay men do?

I sort of get where he is coming from, it's obvious males are programmed to have sex because it's vital for the survival of the species.
Males are by nature more detached and it's in our DNA to procreate as much as possible, so presumably two males are likely to be more horny than a male and a female.
Connected to this in a way, I'm reminded of a fascinating fact from biology about the shape of the head of the human penis - it is shaped in such a way that it "scrapes" other deposited semen back away from from the female's important bits as a man makes love to her and therefore increases the chances of his semen, rather than the other bloke's, making her pregnant. Blimey, what a fantastic chat-up line that is. lol
Isn't nature wonderful and bloody weird at the same time?
Anyway, what do you reckon?....
G-O-W
G-O-W Female
6 days ago
I reckon (respectfully) Stephen Fry doesn't know what he's talking about!

Anyone who has sex just as 'the price they pay for a relationship', well, someone's not doing it right!

I'm sure there are many different responses to this though!

Boy George famously said a cup of tea is better. So, there will be different responses even from gay men.
AndyMacG
AndyMacG Male
6 days ago
OMFG, From reading what you have wrote Hierophant i think my ex girlfriend from a few years back must really be a block putting it mildly if it had a pulse she wanted to shag it!

Steven fry must be smoking something a bit to strong, for him to come out with something like that, TBH i could have a plutonic relationship with a woman, sex isn't the be all and end all.
As for a relationship with another guy, never tried it so couldn't possibly comment!





Andy Mac
NoSaint
NoSaint Female
5 days ago
I don't agree with all Fry says but he does make some valid points. Men are wired to seek sex far more than women especially casual sex. Maybe women love the sexual act more than men and so need it to be more meaningful whereas many men just want sexual release.
Bi-sexual males seem to want it all and take practically anything which is on offer. This is what I found when working in the prison service.
Pixiefluff
Pixiefluff Female
5 days ago
I think our bodies are so cleverly designed. And some women and men have incredibly high sex drives, sometimes I think its down to the relationship depending on how that goes too. 
Pixiefluff
Pixiefluff Female
5 days ago
And some people feel like the people who took part in this study:

Love Doesn't Equal DesireParticipants, by definition of being able to participate in the study, said that their sexual desire never made them doubt their relationship or their feelings for their partner. That is, they saw sexual desire and love for their partner as being completely unrelated.

For example, one participant said: "I never doubted the relationship. And the older I get the surer I am of our relationship."



Further, over half the participants said that they didn't feel their desire discrepancy had a negative impact on their relationship. This subset of women shared that they had deeper and more intimate connections with their partner that went beyond sexual activity. Examples included navigating parenthood and life's ups and downs together as a team, which some women described as keeping their relationship strong, even if they experienced some sexual challenges.
Pixiefluff
Pixiefluff Female
5 days ago
https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/blog/myths-desire/202006/when-women-love-their-partners-dislike-sex-them
Pixiefluff
Pixiefluff Female
5 days ago
deeper and more intimate connections with their partner that went beyond sexual activity that sounds good to me. 
Greencare
Greencare Female
5 days ago
I don't agree with all Fry says but he does make some valid points. Men are wired to seek sex far more than women especially casual sex. Maybe women love the sexual act more than men and so need it to be more meaningful whereas many men just want sexual release.
Bi-sexual males seem to want it all and take practically anything which is on offer. This is what I found when working in the prison service.


You're right on all points. Women do need more meaningful sex.
Greencare
Greencare Female
5 days ago
I don't agree with all Fry says but he does make some valid points. Men are wired to seek sex far more than women especially casual sex. Maybe women love the sexual act more than men and so need it to be more meaningful whereas many men just want sexual release.
Bi-sexual males seem to want it all and take practically anything which is on offer. This is what I found when working in the prison service.


You're right on all points. Women do need more meaningful sex.
Samx
Samx Male
5 days ago
The libido in women and men varies greatly, from non-existent to at least one daily consumption of intercourse. Society and religion has a lot to answer for with regard sex questions.

There is, however, the different nature of male and female. Testosterone and the production of sperm forces the male to ejaculate as often as possible, either by sex, masturbation or wet dreams. it is always the female who decides with whom she shares her DNA, to produce the best possible offspring. This has translated into the idea that women like sex less than men in humans. Males want to spread their DNA as far and wide as possible (hence the existence of harems and prostitution), whilst the female is designed to look for who can provide best for her and her offspring. It is a simple as that.

Homosexuality is very rare in nature, except in humans, due to the above mentioned restrictions and the advancing development of the human mind and distorted/increasingly confused emotions.
AndyMacG
AndyMacG Male
5 days ago
Good god Samx, i don't know where you get your information from?

Do you still read the Beano and Dandy by any chance? lol





Andy Mac
tsunamiwarrior
tsunamiwarrior Male
5 days ago
Homosexuality in animals is very common over hundreds of species but is swept under the carpet by some as they don't want others to know that this is natural.

Sexual behavior takes many different forms, even within the same species and the motivations for and implications of their behaviors have yet to be fully understood. Bagemihl's research shows that homosexual behavior, not necessarily sex, has been documented in about five hundred species as of 1999, ranging from primates to gut worms.[2][5] Homosexuality in animals is seen as controversial by social conservatives because it asserts the naturalness of homosexuality in humans,
tsunamiwarrior
tsunamiwarrior Male
5 days ago
Homosexuality in animals is very common over hundreds of species but is swept under the carpet by some as they don't want others to know that this is natural.

Sexual behavior takes many different forms, even within the same species and the motivations for and implications of their behaviors have yet to be fully understood. Bagemihl's research shows that homosexual behavior, not necessarily sex, has been documented in about five hundred species as of 1999, ranging from primates to gut worms.[2][5] Homosexuality in animals is seen as controversial by social conservatives because it asserts the naturalness of homosexuality in humans,
Colonel_Blink
Colonel_Blink Male
5 days ago
There are a lot things where the truth is known but many will not voice it because they don't want it to be true.
CircusMaximus
CircusMaximus Male
4 days ago
Correct.
CircusMaximus
CircusMaximus Male
4 days ago
Was that comment allowed lol.
sonofEasteregg
sonofEasteregg Male
4 days ago
I;ve liked Stephen fry over the years, with Hugh Lawrie, and then Qi.
But some of todays type things, i dont know, it all gets too much for me.
I noticed he's at loggerheads, if thats the right word, with J K rowling and his lbgt friends, supposedly over something Rowling said. I dont know what its all coming to.
Zealous_Zack
Zealous_Zack Male
4 days ago
JK Rowling made a remark which upset some transgender people but Stephen Fry defended her saying both sides should be quiet, or something like that.
lindy
lindy Female
4 days ago
Ok...what do I reckon? From a lone female perspective ;-)

It's not that women don't like sex as much as men it's just their bodies [from a female perspective] have a lot to put up with.
Sex is messy.....as is our menstruation, menopause etc etc. It's oft about the timing - especially as we age :-)

Yes...we are wired to procreate to keep the species going and kids can knacker us out and cause problems with the 'works'. Sex is not often on the agenda for certain periods of time. Sorry guys!!!

Mills and Boon is a good litmus test for women and sex. Millions [mostly women] buy and read their books with criteria to their format. Romance and sex between a handsome rich guy and a naive woman, doctors and nurses and so on!!!

Having studied a bit of romantic writing [and written it] you find the audience it attracts goes from no sex before marriage to erotica. Take your pick! Women dream more hahaha
On-The-Beach
On-The-Beach Male
4 days ago
All that Stephen Fry's hapless comment tells us is that he is a man who is, indeed, ruled by his dick whereas, I'd guess, most individuals would acknowledge that there are many more layers and levels to a human relationship than by framing one in the manner Fry chooses to present.

As for the statement, "Men are wired to seek sex far more than women especially casual sex"

I can't claim to know if that is scientifically correct but I do know that, personally, I've no reason (or proof) to believe that any personal lack of discipline, mental thought processes or raw animal lust has ever taken over my ability to control myself in an entirely acceptable fashion; not becoming the tedious 'player' type now, thankfully, being called out by a society that no longer tolerates such behaviour.

Anyway. Being so fit and gorgeous as a younger man, I happily played the hard to get role so never had to demean myself by sniffing around girls like a dog on heat. Perhaps less appealing men do have to work harder, who knows?!

No. I don't buy the "Men are hard wired for sex" angle.

I do buy the "Some men are so obsessed with self gratification, they will do anything for sex" angle ... though I'm not and never have been one of them.

Making love, to me, was an emotional glue that, culmatively, bonded my partner and I together over years and decades and, aside from a bit of a mad few years after my marriage failed, I would always use that term rather than just use the word 'sex' though, as far as I can see, Stephen Fry only knows the word sex and, possibly, hasn't ever experienced anything deeper, either physically or emotionally.
On-The-Beach
On-The-Beach Male
4 days ago
"I sort of get where he is coming from, it's obvious males are programmed to have sex because it's vital for the survival of the species."

Not true.

Have you ever seen how distressed a woman may present as she ponders the ever ticking clock that warns her she really, really needs to get the childbirth thing done before she hits 30, 40, 50?

Its vital for the species for both mating partners to facilitate reproduction ... not just the woman ... not just the man ... and in that sense, I'd claim that both the male and the female of the species are wired for sex if that is the term we are expected to use.
FBF_Peace
FBF_Peace Male
4 days ago
he is a man who is, indeed, ruled by his dick

It is a handy phrase but is he ruled by his dick or simply likes a lot of sex? I think he makes some good points as you also do OTB. I have had some amazing relationships and the one which was long term and may have gone the distance ended when she died prematurely. Apart from that it's probably fair to say I have often gone for quantity rather than search for quality and I have enjoyed meeting, making love and having sex with many partners with some only being one night stands. I have always travelled a lot which makes this an easier option. I'm honest, moral and look after my sexual health and quite capable of sharing a one night stand with respect.
We are all different and hopefully non-judgemental in this respect.

Some men are so obsessed with self gratification, they will do anything for sex" angle There can be little doubt about that as we see it all around us every day.

PS. I can sympathise with you Beach. I was also fit and gorgeous as a younger man but accept that I'm now less fit and less gorgeous as an older man but I'm still very happy to have sex or make love. I seriously thought I was fit and gorgeous lol
On-The-Beach
On-The-Beach Male
4 days ago
A great summary of things, FBF. :)

Sex, making love, whatever; is all a bit academic for me at the mo with the hormone therapy suppressing my libido currently BUT now nearly one week into my month of radiotherapy, (if successful), I'd be able to stop the hormone treatment and might regain my fascination for a top heavy sort if I should be so lucky :) Am I allowed to say such a thing these days or does such a comment make me a misogynistic social pariah fit for the stocks or mass stoning?
fosy
fosy Male
3 days ago
a few years ago stephen fry was in s.africa making a documentary about, ithink, homosexuality being frowned on [or even against the law maybe].

anyhow, when discussing homosexuality with someone who didnt agree with it he made the comment that "not all gay men enjoy/engage in penetrative sex", which, if he was speaking from his own point of view would suggest he doesnt think with his dick ??


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