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Do opposites attract?

Or are shared interests better?

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CircusMaximus
CircusMaximus Male
A month ago
Does it matter?
Pixiefluff
Pixiefluff Female
A month ago
I dont think it matters but I'm usually drawn to people who have similar tastes interests or policies.
Samx
Samx Male
A month ago
I believe it’s a bit of both. Opposites spices up a relationship, but need to be balanced with some commonalities, else a relationship fails from the start or does not endure.
wonderoushen
wonderoushen Female
A month ago
Yes I think it does matter hugely, one of the things that bugs me, is when I find a partner actually has totally different views and values to the ones they led me to believe they held at the start of a relationship. Opposing views can be interesting if both of you can live and let live and I think it depends on what they are, but I think all to often you end up more entrenched in your individual positions. Different interests can be good it gives you something to talk about as long as one dosen't feel bullied into having to join in, but they can be complimentary, say if I like like cooking and he likes fishing, he brings me things to cook that we can both enjoy, sort of thing.
Pboro Trevor
Pboro Trevor Male
A month ago
We are all different, so what works for two people may not necessarily work for others

Those who have long lists of what they are looking for in a partner may never find them. Just be open to anyone, anything, you never know what might happen.

Trevor
Pixiefluff
Pixiefluff Female
A month ago
Values are important I can't say I'd date someone who has opposing values, that would cause big problems.
Helenuk1963
Helenuk1963 Female
A month ago
It worked for me, in a way, although our differences were fairly basic and easily overcome.
I wouldn't rule someone out on surface differences, but it can be extremely difficult to get past differences that are deep rooted . Politics, religious beliefs, attitudes etc.
Greencare
Greencare Female
A month ago
I would find it boring if my partner was too similar to me.
HotOrWot
HotOrWot Male
A month ago
All of my long term partners have had very different political views to me and one had very different religious views.

No problem. In fact I found the opposite as the conversations were more interesting listening to opposing views in a friendly way.
Greencare
Greencare Female
A month ago
Exactly HoW.
Minnie-the-Minx
Minnie-the-Minx Female
A month ago
If you have totally different life values, it is highly unlikely to work long term. Unfortunately, sometimes people play with their cards very close to their chest and you may not find out about the deal breakers until later on. Though I think that having some different interests can be a good thing, so long as they are compatible. However, neither of those things matter unless both partners are willing to invest equally into creating a healthy relationship.
Andromeda
Andromeda Female
A month ago
I agree it's about values. One of the my best friends supports a different political party and the politicians they like or trust are ones I feel the opposite about. Our values are almost identical.
The difference is in how we see the problems should be solved to the benefit of everyone not just a lucky few.
capnblackbeard
capnblackbeard Male
A month ago
anyone who wants someone identical to themselves should date your brother or sista,lol
wonderoushen
wonderoushen Female
A month ago
I had that experience Minnie, for three years my ex basically lied or avoided telling me his views and values were very to mine, I didn't really find out until I moved in with him, but which time I felt trapped and it was the begining of the end of our relationship. I know people change over time, but a complete turn around?
Minnie-the-Minx
Minnie-the-Minx Female
A month ago
Good grief, capn, I am nothing like my brother or my sister, or anyone else in my immediate family, for that matter. Thank goodness.
Elj
Elj Male
A month ago
I seem to attract mad women.. I'm not sure if that makes me normal though?
NoSaint
NoSaint Female
A month ago
I agree it's about values. One of the my best friends supports a different political party and the politicians they like or trust are ones I feel the opposite about. Our values are almost identical.
The difference is in how we see the problems should be solved to the benefit of everyone not just a lucky few.


Exactly. Shared values does not have to mean shared politics or shared religion.
HotOrWot
HotOrWot Male
A month ago
Exactly. Shared values does not have to mean shared politics or shared religion.

exactly.
Neros1954
Neros1954 Male
A month ago
Beautiful, intelligent, witty, charming, generous, social, affluent and a very nice person. That could be the opposite I'm attracted to lol.
Andromeda
Andromeda Female
A month ago
I thought you was describing yourself Neros :)
capnblackbeard
capnblackbeard Male
A month ago
sounds very much like yourself :)
Andromeda
Andromeda Female
A month ago
We are all sooooooo polite lol
capnblackbeard
capnblackbeard Male
A month ago
its nice to be nice, great comeback tho,lol
HotOrWot
HotOrWot Male
A month ago
Why would anyone want anything else :)
Greencare
Greencare Female
A month ago
I dated a guy who played a lot of golf. I told him I was going to take up the game and we could have a game together and he nearly had a heart attack with fear showing in his eyes.

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