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Let us post some limericks

I make a start

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Samx  Male  Suffolk
4-Nov-2021 11:15 Message #4845476
A wonderful bird is the pelican,
His bill holds more than his belican.
He can take in his beak,
Enough food for a week,
But I'm damned if I see how the helican.

capnblackbeard  Male  Hertfordshire
4-Nov-2021 11:18 Message #4845478
Hotel, motel, holiday inn, whatcha gonna do today
'Cause I'ma get a fly girl, gonna get some spank and drive off in a def OJ
Hotel, motel, Holiday Inn
You see, if your girl starts acting up, then you take her friend

Samx  Male  Suffolk
4-Nov-2021 11:40 Message #4845485
That’s not a limerick, Captain!

capnblackbeard  Male  Hertfordshire
4-Nov-2021 11:42 Message #4845487
Now what you hear is not a test: I'm rappin' to the beat
And me, the groove, and my friends are gonna try to move your feet
See, I am Wonder Mike, and I'd like to say hello
To the black, to the white, the red
And the brown, the purple and yellow
But first I gotta bang bang the boogie to the boogie
Say up jump the boogie to the bang bang boogie
Let's rock, you don't stop
Rock the riddle that will make your body rock

what about this one,lol

Samx  Male  Suffolk
4-Nov-2021 15:39 Message #4845514
Not a limerick either! A limerick is five lines of which the first, second and fifth rhyme and the two middle ones rhyme differently.

The Norwich bus to Ipswich
emitted an earsplitting pitch
Some people got mad,
others just felt sad
and the bus ended up in a ditch.

AlbertBertieBond  Male  Buckinghamshire
4-Nov-2021 16:25 Message #4845517
A limerick writer we see
He doesn't even charge a fee
He spends all his time
Writing a rhyme
And we enjoy it for free

Samx  Male  Suffolk
4-Nov-2021 19:37 Message #4845533
This author is quite large
and lives on a river barge.
He is as sour as lime
as he thinks all the time
and for his work he charge.

capnblackbeard  Male  Hertfordshire
4-Nov-2021 20:04 Message #4845534
its getting dark now,
my mum says teas ready,
im taking my ball and im going home,
have a great night
fireworks are great :)

LutonLady  Female  Bedfordshire
5-Nov-2021 06:37 Message #4845566
I work with a man who is forever thinking up limericks and some are very funny. he keeps the old folk amused.

zodiac1  Male  Flintshire
5-Nov-2021 07:56 Message #4845583
there was an old man from kent
his tool was exceedingly bent
so to save him the trouble,
he stuffed it in double
and instead of coming, he went

FirmButFair-TrollPatrol  Male  North Yorkshire
5-Nov-2021 11:14 Message #4845611
There as a capn from Herts
Who's limerick did rhyme in parts
Then he went home
With his ball he did roam
And that's how a Limerick starts.

tsunamiwarrior  Male  Hertfordshire
5-Nov-2021 13:26 Message #4845622
I work with a man who is forever thinking up limericks and some are very funny. he keeps the old folk amused.

That's what the limericks are doing on here too.

Samx  Male  Suffolk
5-Nov-2021 15:37 Message #4845633
I know that the captain pretends he doesn’t know what a limerick is. Denying it three times is becoming a bit tedious don’t you think?

The captain had a drink
so he forgot to think!
He thought he was a boss
so he got ever so cross!
I told you this with a wink!

Sea  Female  Essex
5-Nov-2021 16:21 Message #4845640
There once was a man quite thick,
It was really like talking to a brick,
He would cover his ears,
Whilst drinking old beers,
And think it a jolly clever trick.


Luxuriating_Larry  Male  Oxfordshire
5-Nov-2021 17:34 Message #4845648
Limericks are guarded as jealously as Cornish pasties or Yorkshire puddings. You can only call it a limerick if you were born in Limerick and the poem was originally told within the city boundaries.

Samx  Male  Suffolk
6-Nov-2021 21:52 Message #4845751
There is a lady on here
who is quite nasty, I fear
Her thyme really stinks
I’m saying this with winks
and in my eyes a big tear.

Luxuriating_Larry  Male  Oxfordshire
7-Nov-2021 15:43 Message #4845815
Why we join mse all depends
On whether we want dates or friends
If we're happy and nice
Then it's well worth the price
To accept the enjoyment it sends

Greencare  Female  Berkshire
10-Nov-2021 09:28 Message #4846101
I'm not very good at limericks or poetry.

zodiac1  Male  Flintshire
11-Nov-2021 10:04 Message #4846191
There was a young man from Poole,

found red spots all over his tool,

his doctor, a cynic,

said get out of my clinic,

and wipe off that lipstick, you fool

HotOrWot  Male  Lancashire
12-Nov-2021 07:26 Message #4846288
I joined mse for some fun
And this is what I have done
I've met some nice girls
With flowing fair curls
But others have made me run

Luxuriating_Larry  Male  Oxfordshire
12-Nov-2021 15:03 Message #4846327
I'm hoping to get mine out soon
When you see it you might want to swoon
It is very big
Much more than a twig
My tree might need a prune

CircusMaximus  Male  North Yorkshire
13-Nov-2021 08:17 Message #4846401
My Irish friend maintains that limerick is an Irish word meaning jibberish.

HotOrWot  Male  Lancashire
20-Nov-2021 08:05 Message #4847443

MrQuiet_aka_MrD  Male  Northamptonshire
20-Nov-2021 21:17 Message #4847550
People might think that I'm quiet
But I'm really a wild riot
A dance and a drink
Not stopping to think
All action so no need to diet.

NoSaint  Female  Devon
22-Nov-2021 11:59 Message #4847757

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