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Are people on dating sites ..realey looking for love

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joolsy  Female  Essex 23-Aug-2018 15:04 Message #4723837
Hi me darlins ... I found this question online ... Are people on dating sites realey looking for love ... Or are they pretending to boost there egos ... Imo ... You have the real ... People wanting a relationship .. And you have the fakes lol .. They like the attention .. But are more interested in messaging .. Texting .. Pretending they want a relationship but they realey only want the fantasy ... Some are married ... Some just get excited by people fancying them. .. It's not real .. Am I being cynical .. What are your thoughts
joolsy  Female  Essex 23-Aug-2018 15:48 Message #4723840
Lmao hermit ... I forgot that one just to take the piss lol ...
Minnie-the-Minx  Female  Hertfordshire 23-Aug-2018 18:36 Message #4723857
No, I am much the same as you, Joolsy. Even if I weren't old and chubby, I decided that the chances of meeting a man who was both looking for a relationship and capable of one, were less than minimal. That's without taking into account anything else about them, like being a nice person, or compatibility. You have to wade through so many that are just looking for a quick legover that I couldn't even get my head around it this time around.
That's not to say that those things don't exist, just that dating sites are not the place to look any more. I just think that the dating scene has changed so much, since I was looking before.
Anyway, not sure I will come back to this thread. I will probably get slated now.
wonderoushen  Female  Gwynedd 23-Aug-2018 18:37 Message #4723858
I'm just glad I no longer do relationships, I don't think I'd know where to start.
HonestBob  Male  the Central region 23-Aug-2018 18:58 Message #4723865
Not too sure about dating sites. I done pretty well on PoF a few years back, bit no decent quality women to be found, so not for me.

I not sure the type of women I'm after exists anymore...

I've read through some women's profiles on sites, some of them reek of utter desperation, others come across as overly aggressive, and other seem to be on a chat/daring site with things on their profiles like "I'm not looking to chat or date"...

I also don't like the whole idea of men still having to do all the work... 2018 and women still can't ask a man out!

I'll only put effort in with a woman if she is really my type in the looks department, or displays traditional values... or is oriental.
Phoenixnights  Female  Nottinghamshire 23-Aug-2018 19:25 Message #4723873
I think your spot on Minnie. It seems like quite a few, male and female, feel the same.

Years back I could be bothered but now I dont want to waste my time . Life is too short !
Tramontana  Male  Greater Manchester 23-Aug-2018 19:40 Message #4723877

I think that you've answered your own dilemma.

"I'll only put effort in with a woman if she is really my type in the looks department, or displays traditional values... or is oriental. "

Just place an on-line order for an Asian to takeaway.
The_Snow_Covered_Fool  Male  Cheshire 23-Aug-2018 19:58 Message #4723878
I hope there is Joolsy ... I would like to find some bugger before I pop me clogs !

JustLyn  Female  Cheshire 23-Aug-2018 20:07 Message #4723879
When my marriage ended in 2006 I just joined "friendship" sites for a friend, man or woman, to go to the cinema, have coffee. I was totally shocked when a couple of men commented I shouldn't be there because I wasn't dating. One woman said that the men she had met didn't have the right shoes!

On the other hand, I have had the most amazing and growing adventures after a pretty reclusive life up to that point, and I don't mean anything other than friendship. I could write a book...on various things, but the people I have had the pleasure to meet has changed my life forever.

I had a few insults, shallow...I was too tall! (To be a friend?~)
I have met a few characters who have tested my sense of humour and self shallowness. One said he loved me from the start, but he said he had a problem falling for women too soon. Then there was the guy with 2 teeth who told me about his low hanging testicles...seriously...he wasn't being suggestive.

...but then, not dating was a great positive because I was just very lonely and wanted conversation outside my situation. One guy who is still my friend but lives abroad introduced me to politics and music. His wife had left him for their neighbour and I even had a hug off her, and his mum, and his son, also his new wife.
...then there was a guy quite high in Government who's wife was having an affair for 5 years so he thought himself single, but he got prostate cancer and needed a friend. He introduced me to philosophy and we spent evening after evening online chatting about Camus, Aristotle etc.
...another guy I have brought to a couple of meets but we weren't a couple. He used to sleep in my spare room and we shared some week-ends until he met a new partner, here off MSE, after I introduced him to here.
...then there was the guy who dressed in chainmail and played historical Roman soldier at events. I thought he and my friend would get on great, and my partner (who was just a guy I met for coffee later on), went to their wedding around 3 years ago.

I think the best way if to just meet lots of people without sizing them up as a potential partner...the slow burn, just enjoy the company of someone who doesn't set your flame on fire, then before you know it they've snucked in that place in your heart that had become "ready" when you weren't looking.
Hierophant  Male  East Anglia 24-Aug-2018 07:27 Message #4723896
"I found this question online ... Are people on dating sites realey looking for love ... Or are they pretending to boost there egos"

Well, this is a dating site, apparently, so which one are you?...
jennifer  Female  Gloucestershire 24-Aug-2018 09:19 Message #4723899
Slated, Minnie? No way. I agree with you. Great post.
jennifer  Female  Gloucestershire 24-Aug-2018 09:36 Message #4723901
How to get a date when not looking for it ... get in a taxi and get on with the driver like a house on fire and him say you are a lovely lady, could he give his personal number to ring to meet up sometime.

That was before I realised I'd left my suitcase on the coach I'd travelled on from Swindon and he realised he was dealing with a dipstick!!!

(He did take my number to let me know if my case was at the railway station when he got back to the taxi rank there. And he did ring and it wasn't. Have found so many men who can't be relied upon to do what they say they are going to do, but did this cynic the world of good to come across a man who did. He has rung again, too. Obviously likes dipsticks!!)
Eljer  Male  North London 24-Aug-2018 10:20 Message #4723904
I don't like to judge people, so best I sit on my hands, on my profile it says friendship, I am not looking for a quick leg over, ok, so I flirt a lot on the boards, but the handful of people that I have flirted with, ive spoke with them in private messaging or on the phone and we know where we stand before we have met, but theres always one who likes to slate you because it hasn't gone there way when weve met.

Oh, and that's nothing to do with the op or minnies post ;)
jennifer  Female  Gloucestershire 24-Aug-2018 10:33 Message #4723906
If someone slates anyone publically, Eljer, it's obvious that they weren't very good people and you had a narrow escape!

Eljer  Male  North London 24-Aug-2018 10:37 Message #4723908
You've put a spell on me .. you are so right in everything you say twinkle ;)
HonestBob  Male  the Central region 24-Aug-2018 11:03 Message #4723913
"Just place an on-line order for an Asian to takeaway."

Well if only it was that easy... as I've said before my brother went to india for a while and came back with a woman, they are happily married and have two lovely children together. Might need to hop in a flight to Bejing or Tokyo.
joolsy  Female  Essex 24-Aug-2018 15:50 Message #4723924
Hi hiero ... I guess I was looking for love .. But I'm a realist .. It ain't going to happen lol ... Online dating worked for daughter she has been married for 4 yrs ... So it does work for the younger ones .. I found the question online and it did make me think ... I'm 60 with ms etc .. So my chances are limited .. Also with online I doint think its for me .. Also I doint no how others feel .. But the genuine people are hard to find and you climb back in ya shell were it's safe
barney  Male  Surrey 24-Aug-2018 17:08 Message #4723929
I was chatting to a woman I met on the internet and we were getting on quite well and then she said she wasn't interested.
All because of the car I live in.
joolsy  Female  Essex 24-Aug-2018 17:13 Message #4723931
Lol barney ... Her lose ... I bet it's a lovely car as well lol ;)
barney  Male  Surrey 24-Aug-2018 18:08 Message #4723935
Well all the women on the 25 dating sites I'm on look sad and desperate.
Cassis  Female  Cambridgeshire 24-Aug-2018 23:56 Message #4723995
Does that include this one, Barney?
barney  Male  Surrey 25-Aug-2018 10:07 Message #4724004
It was a joke Cassis lol. Read it again.

Not looked at all the women on here. I only see the ones on the threads and you are all lovely.
mancers  Male  Greater Manchester 25-Aug-2018 10:25 Message #4724006
Although it would be nice to meet someone, being realistic it won’t happen, so I’m happy to join in the banter every week or two, I have made friends on here over the years and some have blocked me, but it is a friendship site as well as dating, so I will carry on giving my sixpence whether you like it or not.
wonderoushen  Female  Gwynedd 25-Aug-2018 10:37 Message #4724009
What even me?
mancers  Male  Greater Manchester 25-Aug-2018 10:41 Message #4724010
With you I make an exemption. :)

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