Conversation Dating and Relationships
Helper icon Helpers: Chris2mates , LLstill , PrincessFruitBat


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Sex

And the consequences

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Female
Cassis  Female  Cambridgeshire
24-May-2018 23:15 Message #4717714
Sorry to lower the high-brow tone of MSE, or shock the sensibilities of our aging population on here (lol!)...but do you agree with what is often stated as a biological truism: after sleeping with (whispers "having sex") with the same person 7 times, you will form/experience attachment to them? Is there any such magic number? :)
Male
vanman  Male  Cambridgeshire
25-May-2018 05:16 Message #4717717
I would have thought (from what I can remember!) (lol) ...

That if the sleeping with ("having sex") was any good, you would "form/experience "attachment" to them"
the first time!! lol ;-}
Male
badman  Male  Suffolk
25-May-2018 06:47 Message #4717718
If it was all within a 24 hour period, I'd say you had something special.


(Note to self. Put this into practice ASAP for research purposes).
Female
Helper icon Helper
PrincessFruitBat  Female  Essex
25-May-2018 07:42 Message #4717719
It’s my guess that many would have formed some kind of attachment to that person before having sex for the first time.
Female
nellieredshoes  Female  West Yorkshire
25-May-2018 11:03 Message #4717726
In my experience Andyp it’s not a generational thing at all. As someone in her 70s who became sexually active in the 60s people of all ages have always been liberated and advanced. As we get older we just don’t get as much opportunity to practice.
As for the idea that it takes seven tries to become attached I thought that was to get to like the taste of a new food.
I’m with vanners. If it’s good thefirst time I’m hooked immediately. Lol
Male
HonestBob  Male  the Central region
25-May-2018 11:23 Message #4717730
"It’s my guess that many would have formed some kind of attachment to that person before having sex for the first time."

I would like to agree with Princess, I certainly would prefer to have some "attachment" before shagging.

I had to read the OP a few times to get the gist of it, I would say if there was no attachment before having sex the first time, and it continued another 6 times, Wouldn't you end up feeling a degree of numbness to the person? Like it's just a chore, or a mundane task to be suffered? Unless sexual attraction was high.

I think it may be the other things that go on around the sex, that create the attachment.
Female
eurostar  Female  Merseyside
25-May-2018 18:39 Message #4717747
Now having sex with the same person 7 times? Is that on the 3rd date or 4th date or when?.lol.lol
Male
badman  Male  Suffolk
25-May-2018 18:51 Message #4717749
Hey Euro. I'm doing some research. Wanna come down for the weekend? lol. lol. lol.
Female
eurostar  Female  Merseyside
25-May-2018 18:57 Message #4717751
Lol badman, think we can do first meet, 7 times in 24hours and prove the survey wrong? Lol lol
Male
badman  Male  Suffolk
25-May-2018 19:13 Message #4717753
I'd give it damn good try. May need some jump leads. lol.lol.lol.
Female
eurostar  Female  Merseyside
25-May-2018 19:21 Message #4717754
Lol lol lol
Male
Horiss  Male  central London
25-May-2018 19:37 Message #4717755
Absolutely no truth in those numbers what so ever. I became sexually and emotionally attached to my right hand first time as a teenager.
Male
The_Snow_Covered_Fool  Male  Cheshire
25-May-2018 22:15 Message #4717762
Is five times a night ok ???





Chris.
Male
Nigel_In_Devon  Male  Devon
26-May-2018 07:23 Message #4717770
Is that question aimed at Cassis or Snowy as I think the answer will be different for each.

Female
wonderoushen  Female  Gwynedd
26-May-2018 11:27 Message #4717781
Mostly I will have got bored after 7 times, if theres nothing else to keep me interested then I just stop, often I just go off sex anyway and prefer the other aspects of relationships.
Male
badman  Male  Suffolk
26-May-2018 12:36 Message #4717786
"often I just go off sex anyway". Now that's phrase I hear from women over 'a certain age'.

(Note to self again. Date younger women and hope they can keep up).
Female
eurostar  Female  Merseyside
26-May-2018 19:25 Message #4717802
seriously go off sex???….older women don't have menstruation and mood swings go so sex can be done anytime anyplace anywhere...…..and research has shown its great for your memory skin hair mind etc etc...…..and its free and exercise and all good stuff...lol
Male
johnlock  Male  Essex
26-May-2018 19:30 Message #4717803
I'm sat here, scratching my head, trying to remember what sex is/was.

Regards
John
Female
eurostar  Female  Merseyside
26-May-2018 19:32 Message #4717804
john ya need to go get some then, lol.lol.lol
Male
badman  Male  Suffolk
26-May-2018 19:42 Message #4717805
Oh I remember those anytime, anyplace, anywhere days. It's such a shame that, as some women get older, they're not as adventurous as they were, if they ever were.
Some women still behave young, others have resigned themselves to 'being too old for that sort of thing'.
They say we don't stop having fun when you get older, you get older when you stop having fun.

So ladies, leave your knickers at home. Or at least put them in your pocket.
Female
nellieredshoes  Female  West Yorkshire
27-May-2018 08:12 Message #4717818
Oh badders. You really didn’t read euros post properly did you? X
Female
wonderoushen  Female  Gwynedd
27-May-2018 11:25 Message #4717830
For me its rarely been about age, I've just gone through periods when I've been intensly sexual and then when I have next to no sexual feelings whatsoever. Its nothing to do with feeling inhibited or that I've got to "keep up". Inhibition isn't a women only problem, I've had plenty of male partners who're inhibited, they've been taught somehow, through cultural osmosis maybe, what "nice girls" do and don't do and if you're not a "nice girl" then it can effect the whole of the rest of the relationship.

I've been off sex for years now and you know its liberating, I have so much more room in my head for other things, so much more energy for other things, more creativity, I wouldn't swap sexual feelings for what I have now, I actually dread the thought of them ever coming back. It all feels like such a minefield, the whole dating, do you fancy them, do they fancy you, how to negotiate your way around other peoples needs and expectations and match them up with your own.

I'm done with compromising my life away to the needs of others and that includes sex, so often I've felt that because I'm uninhibited guys think that I'm consenting to anything and everything, I'm not and that seems a big shock to them. I've had the 'I thought you were different' conversation more than once because there are some things I don't want to do, but somehow its always ok for them to not want to do what would please me. The more distance I get from my time as an active sexual being the more I see in retrospect how exploitative its been for me, the way I felt constantly that I had to battle to have any autonomy about what I wanted and not to just be a one woman service industry.
Male
A_man_called_CHIOG  Male  South East London
28-May-2018 10:37 Message #4717888
i like your post wonderoushen. Interesting to hear a different point of view.
Male
mazdaman123  Male  Lancashire
22-Jun-2018 14:22 Message #4719193
plenty have web cam sex these days
Female
Andromeda  Female  Berkshire
22-Jun-2018 16:32 Message #4719209
Is it actually sex if only on a camera?

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