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More than 100,000 divorces in England and Wales last year

Male
CircusMaximus  Male  North Yorkshire
17-Nov-2020 13:01 Message #4798161
"There were more than 100,000 divorces among heterosexual couples in England and Wales last year, new figures reveal.

Office for National Statistics data published on Tuesday showed there were 107,599 opposite-sex divorces in 2019, an increase of 18.4% from 90,871 in 2018.

It is the highest number of divorces since 2014, when 111,169 were granted.

There were also 822 same-sex divorces, nearly twice the number (428) in 2018."

Is marriage dying a slow death.
Male
FirmButFair-TrollPatrol  Male  North Yorkshire
17-Nov-2020 15:43 Message #4798168
There are fewer marriages but why? Are we turning against the idea of commitment or the ceremony itself?
Male
AndyMacG  Male  the West Midlands
17-Nov-2020 17:31 Message #4798172
Had i been married in 2018 there might have been another divorce in 2019 ;-) ha ha






Andy Mac
Female
twinkle2  Female  Hertfordshire
17-Nov-2020 18:29 Message #4798178
I bet there'll be more caused by lockdown this year.
Male
persona_non_grata  Male  North London
17-Nov-2020 18:39 Message #4798179
A lot of divorces result from couples being together for a few days of Christmas. Apparently marriages work much better if you don't see each other lol.
Female
wonderoushen  Female  Gwynedd
17-Nov-2020 18:43 Message #4798181
'Is marriage dying a slow death'? That would depend on the nuber of marriages there are? We all live so much longer and theres so much expectation piled on relationships to me it seems unresonable to expect relationships to be life long. Because that life is a hell of a long time and esepcially so if ones in an unhappy relationship, or just a plain unfulfilling one, people drift apart.
Male
terry  Male  West Yorkshire
17-Nov-2020 20:35 Message #4798196
I wonder if we've created a self absorbed society, but if I remember correctly, marriage is a new fangled thing amongst the masses anyway?
Female
wonderoushen  Female  Gwynedd
18-Nov-2020 18:55 Message #4798269
Theres one easy way to lower divorce statistics, don't get married!
Female
Minnie-the-Minx  Female  Hertfordshire
18-Nov-2020 19:04 Message #4798271
lol I agree with wonderoushen there. I came to the conclusion long ago that men and women are really not designed for living together.

Personally, I would much rather that people were able to escape toxic relationships than be locked into a life time of abuse when and if it all goes tits up. I would like to turn it on its head. Divorce it not too easy. Having done it and have the T shirt, I can vouch for that. Getting married is too easy. I think people need more education before they set up home together and perhaps counselling on what their expectations are and how realistic they are. From personal experience, I naively assumed that a husband would love and cherish me, in return for the love and support that I provided.
Female
Minnie-the-Minx  Female  Hertfordshire
18-Nov-2020 19:07 Message #4798272
Plus, 100,000 divorces per annum doesn't sound very many to me.

Though what astonishes me most is the number of people that not only do it once, but several more times thereafter. A triumph of optimism over experience, for sure. I would imagine that the serial divorcers bump up the figures somewhat.
Male
HotOrWot  Male  Lancashire
19-Nov-2020 08:42 Message #4798299
A friend of mine has been married three times and is now single again. Some people never learn LOLOL.
Female
wonderoushen  Female  Gwynedd
19-Nov-2020 10:27 Message #4798316
I think some people have an idea of what a relationship/marriage is and spend a lifetime tryiing to cram a succession of people into the idea, it never occurs to them that it might be the idea thats a fault.
Female
BunnyGirl  Female  Buckinghamshire
19-Nov-2020 12:06 Message #4798334
I think a lot of people do not give or take it is them all the time. Lot of people are selfish these days and it’s me me me all the time
Female
BunnyGirl  Female  Buckinghamshire
19-Nov-2020 12:08 Message #4798335
Should be give and take

Female
JustLyn  Female  Cheshire
19-Nov-2020 14:25 Message #4798338
My take on marriage.

Another factor of instant gratification, not only in getting married too quickly, but the gratification of having a hugely expensive ceremony.

Change of lifestyles and expectations, people used to put up with unhappiness, work things out, or indeed suffer for years, but now a partner might be cast off like an old shoe.

Reduction of family communities, where an adult child might have been able to unload onto people close to them, whereas now many jobs are miles away, or connections are on social media.

People are more reactionary, maybe take issue with some things that previously would have been worked through.

It is easy to judge people too quickly on numbers of marriages though. I've been married twice, was with my first partner from age 16 to basically 21, when he was posted away by the air force, we each thought we should split but later regretted it but the damage was done. He remarried, and she had an affair twice, then she left him. Then he married a service woman officer, and she went off with someone else whilst my ex was posted in the Falklands war. He liked being married, so married again, the wrong woman who has made him miserable for years after that but he stick with her because he has two grown kids now, and 4 marriages are enough.

If he ever was free, even though it would be a 5th relationship, he is actually a really nice and loyal guy so circumstances have not actually been in his control.

I wouldn't get married again, I don't feel a need to. We both have adult children at home and even just the finances don't bare thinking about and the complications it would create.
I feel we have living apart together just right for both of us, but maybe not if we were starting out and planning children.
Male
BOYDEL  Male  Surrey
19-Nov-2020 14:31 Message #4798340
These days only around half of couples choose to get married - as evidenced by the fact that around half of all new births are to non married couples.

About half of all first marriages end in divorce and a higher proportion of subsequent marriages.

Many married or indeed non married couples will be staying together simply because they cannot afford to separate - especially so the 37% living in rentals where each party walks away with nothing.

UK already has 29% of households with a sole occupant and around a further 8% with a lone parent adult.

I agree with W'Hen that a potential 60 plus years of marriage is in many case far too long as people do change.

Indeed Rod Stewart said same thing many years ago by pointing out that when marriage as we know it was initially set up the average lifespan was maybe 35/40 years so in fact it was literally till death do us part in most cases.


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