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My mum said -

Male
CircusMaximus  Male  North Yorkshire
14-Sep-2020 14:50 Message #4792291
If I don't wash my ears potatoes would start to grow in them.
Male
tumbled  Male  Gloucestershire
14-Sep-2020 15:09 Message #4792292
I couldn't wash my ears properly as my eyesight was bad from not eating my carrots....and my hair had grown long and curly from eating my bread crusts....
Female
JustLyn  Female  Cheshire
14-Sep-2020 15:35 Message #4792293
If I didn't scrub my neck I would look like a Beatnik (whatever it is).

That if I are the little "tomatoes" off the houseplant, lots of maggots would go in my mouth.

That if I went anywhere near the edge of that pond (in the field beyond) there would be a cobra that would come out and drag me in.

If I stood too near the side of a canal, big gates under the water would trap me and drag me down.
Male
persona_non_grata  Male  North London
14-Sep-2020 17:15 Message #4792298
"Shut that door .. were you born in a barn" which was a bit worrying because if your mum doesn't know where you were born ............
Male
tumbled  Male  Gloucestershire
14-Sep-2020 17:19 Message #4792300
When my mum Mary and dad Joseph used to say that to me....I would say 'Yes...I was.....don't you remember?...It was around Christmas time....3 blokes came to visit....a couple brought some weird stuff....but the other had some gold'
Female
Minnie-the-Minx  Female  Hertfordshire
14-Sep-2020 18:05 Message #4792307
maybe she found you under a gooseberry bush, png.
Female
wonderoushen  Female  Gwynedd
14-Sep-2020 18:39 Message #4792309
CM, I was told that if I didn't wash my feet properly potatoes would grow between my toes. Trouble with saying that sort of thing to a child is that some of us are curious enough to see if its true, I'm still waiting!
Male
persona_non_grata  Male  North London
14-Sep-2020 21:52 Message #4792328
MtM. The gooseberry bush is a possibility although I do recall some talk about a stork!
Female
RAACH84  Female  Buckinghamshire
15-Sep-2020 16:57 Message #4792381
My mum often said I would understand when I was a parent. She was so right.
Female
Gilpin  Female  Middlesex
16-Sep-2020 20:34 Message #4792482
Stand up straight.

Stop making a face, the wind will change and you'll be stuck with it.

One day you'll thank me.
Male
persona_non_grata  Male  North London
17-Sep-2020 08:26 Message #4792511
If things don't change they'll stay the same. Quite profound lol.
Female
wonderoushen  Female  Gwynedd
17-Sep-2020 10:40 Message #4792523
My Mum and Nan used to say things like 'I'm not as green as I'm cabbage looking' and 'I'm not as daft as I'm pudding faced', I'd spend ages wondering what on earth these things meant. What sort of pudding did they look like? What sort of cabbage? And they wern't green either.
Female
Greencare  Female  Berkshire
18-Sep-2020 12:34 Message #4792640
March to the beat of a different drummer. I must have been doing something wrong on these occasions.
Male
tumbled  Male  Gloucestershire
18-Sep-2020 12:40 Message #4792641
If I don't wash my ears potatoes would start to grow in them.

That would be handy when there's a shortage.....Remember when chips doubled in price.....Too many people washing their ears...

Female
Minnie-the-Minx  Female  Hertfordshire
18-Sep-2020 12:59 Message #4792650
When I asked my mum how babies got out of her tummy, she told me that they got out the same way they got in. It was a few years until I was a bit older and found out that it was nothing to do with bellybuttons.
Male
Neros1954  Male  Devon
18-Sep-2020 17:07 Message #4792660
Do you think your socks will pick themselves up?
Male
tumbled  Male  Gloucestershire
18-Sep-2020 18:34 Message #4792666
A sort of Billy Connolly one....he used his dad though....

Kid : Can I have a new bike please Mum....

Mum : BIKE!....BIKE!.....I'll give you bike.......
Male
HotOrWot  Male  Lancashire
20-Sep-2020 11:43 Message #4792832
A locked door only keeps an honest man out. It never made sense at the time.
Male
tumbled  Male  Gloucestershire
27-Sep-2020 07:05 Message #4793361
You'll be laughing on the other side of your face....


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