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Phillip Schofield opens up about being gay

Should it matter... and should we even care?

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Male
Beach  Male  Dorset
7-Feb-2020 14:28 Message #4769993
And while we're on this general topic, you might be surprised to learn that the word "queer" has been reclaimed as a positive term by the LBGT movement. My interpretation of that is that the word queer is now supposed to represent an ambiguous sexual or gender based state purposefully meant to be a fuzzy explanation for folk not content or happy to be, otherwise, labelled gay, straight, bi, lesbian or whatever. Queer now, apparently, just means "I don't want or I don't wish to share or label my sexuality or gender as anything that can be pinned down."

My personal thoughts?

I have no issue at all with any of the above EXCEPT when it comes to how a male might, naturally, relate to a female or vice versa.

I say; people can slice up concepts of sexuality into as many fine, wafer slim, versions as they like but I think things get crazy when a man (or woman), is chastised for daring to view the opposite sex purely in a physical, sexual, way. The way nature intended.

The way nature intended? Perhaps but today, expect to be vilified and judged for daring to listen or act upon your genes or DNA.

But this is a crazy state of affairs, isn't it?

Doesn't nature rely on male / female courtships and all that that entails? (Swollen chests, the flaunting of sexual body parts, physical contact, etc) yet a 21st century male or female human being is challenged or locked up for daring to do what the birds or the bees do.

It appears that everyone, apart from regular good old heterosexual types, now have some platform from which to launch their myriad and varied sexual persuasions yet yours truly might easily be regarded as a perv for daring to be mesmerised by a bouncing pair of double D's.
---
Just ponder the million ways all animals of nature engage in their courtships then realise that we straight Hetro humans, alone, are denied any such natural expression unless we wish to find ourselves doing time!

So sure. The whole world is ebbing and flowing sexually, (and being celebrated for it), while us straight types find our own sexual expression being corralled and hemmed into some politically correct pen.

I ask; How can this bizarre, topsy turvy, outlook exist and prevail?
Male
Hierophant  Male  East Anglia
7-Feb-2020 15:20 Message #4769995
Ha ha yeah I heard Jamila Jameel however you spell her name came out as "queer" yesterday. The last I remember queer was a bad phrase a bit like poof or being bent and shouldn't be used.
I have no idea what queer means now and don't particularly care, the whole thing has become pathetic and probably doesn't register with most people away from twitter. It seems to be a way for sad people to say "look at me I'm unique"
It's quite scary how we are teaching people, especially youngsters, that they can be whatever they want or do whatever they want and nobody is allowed to stop them. I think most of us on here know only too well life isn't like that.

On the Schofield thing, I actually remember a rumour many years ago, I guess you'd call it an urban rumour about Schofield and a well known Radio 1 DJ. It was all part of that Blue Peter, children's telly group and may not have been so off the mark after all, given today's shock announcement!!!!! lol
But is he gay or queer, pan-sexual, non-binary, self-identifying or some other pathetic social media Lib Dem inspired term? Apparently there are 100 or so....
Female
KatieBubbles  Female  West Sussex
7-Feb-2020 15:54 Message #4770000
A lot of men and women of Philip Schofields generation who were born gay would have tried to lead the life of a straight person and conform to the stereotypical expectations of a straight person. Although people are becoming more educated these days it is still a slow process and perhaps the public coming out of Schofield will help some of those who feel uneasy at doing so themselves.

It has been difficult for homosexuals but it is still very obvious that those who are not homosexual are often unable to understand that many people are born that way and have no choice in the matter. What can be a very traumatic time for homosexuals even leading to suicides can just as easily be a light hearted or humourous subject to those with no understanding.
Male
tumbled  Male  Gloucestershire
7-Feb-2020 16:18 Message #4770002
I can't say that I understand about being gay...and the 'coming out' process....

As attitudes etc have changed over the years, people have their own ways of dealing with it....in their own time...

I'm not sure how I would handle it if I was gay....Would I have married a woman?....just for the sake of it...to keep up the pretence......Would i have come out years ago?...when a lot of people started 'coming out'...

In this case....I suppose other than now knowing about it, the rest is none of my business....Will he split with his wife?....Will he set up with a man?....Who knows.....in a way...who cares...He'll do what he wants...

Although it could be a controversial comment, I hope he doesn't start 'flaunting' it...and letting it dominate everything he says and wears etc.....It may sound homophobic....but when Elton John 'came out', for instance....it seemed to change my opinion of him.....I often haven't liked him in recent years.....where he goes all 'gay innuendo' in an interview etc....I get a bit fed up of it.....I've always liked his music though.....
Male
Colonel_Blink  Male  Buckinghamshire
7-Feb-2020 16:21 Message #4770004
I agree with the annoying gay innuendo of some stars but when I think about it I feel much the same about any sexual innuendo flaunted in that way whatever the sexualities involved.
Male
Hierophant  Male  East Anglia
7-Feb-2020 16:39 Message #4770005
Yeah there is a bit of hypocrisy about this stuff, I've heard people saying today that it will be good one day when a person doesn't need to "come out". Er well how is that going to work exactly?
Schofield has been married for 27 years and fathered two daughters, not the typical actions of a gay man, so how can he not "come out"? Are we supposed to just not notice when he goes off and starts living with a man?
Are we heading to a society where chopping and changing and leaving lots of broken hearts in our wake is seen as acceptable because we are being who we want, when we want?
I'm just pleased he said he's gay and not some vague term that seem all the rage these days....
Female
Clocky  Female  the West Midlands
7-Feb-2020 17:41 Message #4770010
I don't care. His sex life isn't my business and I find it really weird, that in this day and age, homosexual people feel the need or pressure to publicly declare something so personal. Where is it written that we must declare our sexual orientation ¿
Male
Colonel_Blink  Male  Buckinghamshire
7-Feb-2020 17:47 Message #4770012
I don’t see any hypocrisy heiro and I don’t see any chopping and changing and are being who we want when we ant or being who we are but sometimes afraid to let others know due to the reception be8ng gay can generate with some people. Why would a gay man use a vague term!

I agree with the lady wearing lots of specs.
Female
Aely  Female  Hampshire
7-Feb-2020 18:04 Message #4770014
I like Philip Schofield. He seems such a really nice guy. He comes across as having a lovely nature. That's all I care about really. He was always out of my league, too young -and married - so not somebody I could ever hope to get together with, so why should I care what his sexuality is? It doesn't affect my enjoyment of his presence on tv.
Male
Hierophant  Male  East Anglia
7-Feb-2020 18:09 Message #4770016
"Why would a gay man use a vague term!"

And that's why I said I'm glad he didn't.
In my simple world you are straight, gay or bisexual, all this pan-sexual, non-binary stuff is nonsense and, in my view, plays on the emotions of others...
Female
wonderoushen  Female  Gwynedd
7-Feb-2020 18:59 Message #4770024
I agree Clocky and Aely, why should we care? Does his sexual orientation matter more than being a nice person, not to me it dosen't. The only time someones sexual orientation becomes my business is I fancy them or they fancy me.

I've always believed that sexuality is a spectrum and we all sit somewhere on it, some are right up the hetro end, like me, others at the gay part and many people sit somewhere in the middle. Some people sit nowhere at all and don't get what all the fuss about sex is at all and that should be OK too, surely there are far more important things going on in the world than what people do with other consenting adults genatalia? One thing thats always confounded me is the horrified reaction of many straight men to gay men, why the outrage, I really don't understand?
Male
Nigel_In_Devon  Male  Devon
7-Feb-2020 19:31 Message #4770029
I'm guessing he was worried he would be outed by a newspaper, some sad blackmailer or some such thing and wanted his mum to hear it from him first.
Male
Beach  Male  Dorset
7-Feb-2020 19:49 Message #4770031
Animal Zoo

Baboon; “What you in for, Peacock?”

Peacock; “I’ve got life for stalking a very attractive pea hen. And, apparently, opening up and displaying my array of beautiful feathers is liable to make other animals feel inadequate or jealous … so I’m forbidden from repeating “such a wanton display of self promotion”.

Baboon; “And you, Big Cat. What are you doing time for?

Big Cat; “Well … it seems we’re not allowed to spray our musk across our territory any more. Environmental Health have shut down my savanna until the grasses burned by my urine have been allowed to recover and grow again. (Pause) Grrrrr. The world has gone mad.”

Baboon; “It sure has, Big Cat … and you see these pads on my rear? They go bright red and swollen in order to attract me a mate but, since the new way, I’ve been branded an outcast and a threat to the young for “blatantly asserting my sexuality" in a manner that might corrupt them.
---
Obviously the above scenario is ridiculous but it highlights just how strange it would be if animals were judged, condemned and restricted from being allowed to use their natural means of courtship when planning to mate and reproduce.

Humans have put themselves in such a position and while I'm not saying "anything should go" in the laws of flirting, mating or reproducing, it is rather strange that, thanks to our current artificial structure of society and civilisation, mankind's / womankind's natural rituals for reproduction have become so detached and distant from reality that they are now being governed, instead, by some social-political philosophy designed to file down any of the sharp edges of evolution deemed unfit to display out in public.

Oh. But hang on.

If you're gay, queer, pan-sexual, non-binary, self-identifying or something else ... just carry on regardless.

Just don't be straight ... and if you see bouncing double d's, just pretend you haven't ... or there will be hell to pay.
Female
Clocky  Female  the West Midlands
7-Feb-2020 20:49 Message #4770035
I'm not sure he is a nice person. His wife is now at risk of losing the life she knows, her truth is now distorted after a lifetime of being kept in the dark. Those are not the actions of a nice person. They're the actions of a self centered person. Saying thank you to his family for their support, like he's a victim is sickening, it's his wife I feel is the real victim.

Female
Victoriana11  Female  Buckinghamshire
7-Feb-2020 21:21 Message #4770036
I agree with Clocky
Male
Hierophant  Male  East Anglia
7-Feb-2020 21:34 Message #4770039
No doubt the poor guy and his family will have every inch of their lives pored over by the tabloid press now, but maybe she knew, maybe she has known for years. You women pick up on everything don't you? lol
Maybe it's one of those oddities of life, but how can a truly gay man be with a woman, sleep with her, make her pregnant etc etc? I don't think I could pretend to be turned on by another man, live with him and keep the pretence for 30 years.
Surely your partner would see through it wouldn't they?...
Female
eurostar  Female  Merseyside
7-Feb-2020 21:44 Message #4770040
It's a shame society years ago didn't let him come out, I, m glad he has now, poor wife though, she must feel as though every sexual incident between them was fake
Male
Beach  Male  Dorset
7-Feb-2020 22:18 Message #4770043
When I first saw the news, I thought it was one of those online scams of the "Phillip Scholfield got rich on bitcoin" type where This Morning footage was edited to tell a false marketing story.

I wonder if it will prompt other stars to share their ... errrr ... sexuality.

Gary Lineker perhaps?
Female
justkath1960  Female  East Sussex
7-Feb-2020 22:20 Message #4770044
I hear what posters are saying in relation to Philip Schofield's wife and I can't say how she will feel I can only tell my own story. I had been married for many years when my husband broke down and told me that he felt that he was in the wrong body, he went on to tell me that he had tried all his life to be what "society" perceived him to be according to his birth gender. At first I was horrified and oh so angry =when he started his transition as mtf, I hated this trans woman who had taken my husband away, I grieved for my husband and the life we had had, I never had the slightest inkling my husband felt that way, he had never shown any signs and he was certainly not effeminate, the only sign I can now see in hindsight is that we did not have a intimate life as such, but I had always put that down to me being very overweight (I was 23 stone at the time) but we were always best friends and I could trust him with my life.

When she first came out I did not have much to do with her for a while, I was just too angry and hurt, but later on I started to look at the situation a different way and I felt sad, so sad for a person who had to live their whole life a lie, just because they knew society would not accept them just the way they were, and to be true to them self meant they would be ridiculed and they would be ostracized, I also felt really humble that this person trusted me enough to tell me the truth, he could have just left me (we had no children of the marriage) and gone off to begin the transition and I would never have known and I would always have thought it was me that was at fault. That took a lot of courage on their part.

Now 7 years later we are the best of friends, she is not a weirdo or a c++k in a frock as some awful people have said, she is post surgery and has fully transitioned and is now a beautiful trans woman, engaged to be married. she works as a trauma nurse for the nhs and has taken her rightful place in society. The only thing that she and my former husband share is a kind heart and a willingness to help others. My children from my first marriage adore her, she is the auntie they never had and she will always have a place in our family.

I feel so glad that in this day and age we are more accepting and no longer do people have to live a lie just to please society. So many trans/gay/non-binary individuals take their own lives, this section of society is where the highest rate of suicide lies because so many of these individuals can no longer " live the lie" presenting the facade they know society expects of them but sadly also cannot face the backlash of "coming out"
Male
BlackMark1  Male  Leicestershire
7-Feb-2020 22:54 Message #4770045
An interesting and informative post justkath which helps us understand the conflict of emotions felt by all those involved. Thank you for sharing.
Female
Clocky  Female  the West Midlands
7-Feb-2020 23:14 Message #4770046
Just Kath... Great photo :)
I think transcending gender is a different kettle of fish, much harder to be open about until more recent years and more to get your head around as a wife/partner as you will effectively be married to someone of the same sex, a totally different person and possibly in effect a stranger. I take my hat off to you for the level of forgiveness and your ability to build a sound friendship xx
Whilst I totally understand the angst of someone being trapped in a body they don't belong in. As much as I try I couldn't have any level of sympathy for PS he could have come out 30 years ago with all the other celebs that were breaking the so called taboos... The fact that he didn't come out sooner it what I find disrespectful to his wife. He's used her to stop his own discomfort. With all the crap press he's been getting lately, I'll say his timing to become a victim is very convenient.
Female
LutonLady  Female  Bedfordshire
7-Feb-2020 23:36 Message #4770048
It’s impossible to judge the torment Schofield may have gone through or how difficult it was for him to come out. We can only guess how we might react in a similar situation.
Female
Greencare  Female  Berkshire
8-Feb-2020 08:08 Message #4770049
Phillip Schofield opens up about being gay
Should it matter... and should we even care?

The simple answer is no and no.
Male
Hierophant  Male  East Anglia
8-Feb-2020 08:35 Message #4770057
"As much as I try I couldn't have any level of sympathy for PS he could have come out 30 years ago with all the other celebs that were breaking the so called taboos.."

I totally agree, I would argue in his line of work it would be easier coming out as gay than if he was a welder at a factory in Bolton. I'm 54 and as long as I can remember "showbiz" has been filled with gay men whose careers didn't appear to suffer from it. In fact their honesty and "I don't give a toss" attitude made them even more popular.
I agree it's not news and we shouldn't care, but the news channels obviously felt different as it was headline news all day and pushed coronavirus off the top spot....
Male
Wandering4fun  Male  North Yorkshire
8-Feb-2020 08:55 Message #4770058
How can anyone possibly know the fears or traumas going through Philip Schofield’s mind. It’s very easy when it is not ourselves we are talking about and with hindsight to comment on someone else’s decisions.
I don’t think many gays have decided to come out in the past and those who are high profile find it much more difficult due to gossip and vilification.

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