Conversation The Common Room
Helper icon Helpers: Chris2mates , LLstill , PrincessFruitBat


About us


Midsummer's Eve is a free online dating community - based around friendship, real meetups, real people, and real relationships. We've been online since 1999 and have twice won Radio 2's Web Site of the Day award. So why not join us for free and join in the discussion?

Are you getting enough?

Is modern life making sex less commonplace?

Male
A_man_called_CHIOG  Male  South East London 8-May-2019 07:22 Message #4739747
A survey suggests that British people are having less sex than they were in the recent past. The findings, published in the British Medical Journal, suggest nearly a third of men and women have not had sex in the past month. In 2001, the figure was nearer a quarter. But half of women and nearly two thirds of men said they wanted more sex. Lead researcher Prof Kaye Wellings said the "sheer pace of modern life" might be part of the reason for the statistics.

The survey could be right. I’m always rushing about and even when I’m not working there seems to be so many things I need to do.
Male
tsunamiwarrior  Male  Hertfordshire 8-May-2019 08:32 Message #4739753
We're mostly past it on this site so the question should be "Are you getting any"

What??
Male
warmundeft  Male  Wrexham 8-May-2019 09:59 Message #4739763
Nope !
Female
BunnyGirl  Female  Buckinghamshire 8-May-2019 10:28 Message #4739769
Depends on what you need. I can go without sex for a long time as i have to fancy someone but
then they may not be any good in bed. So a waste of time.


And please don't ask me why it was no good just take my word only men have no idea of love making
at least as far as i am concerned. At least thr ones i have met ha ha Yes useless.
Female
wonderoushen  Female  Gwynedd 8-May-2019 11:00 Message #4739771
I have absolutely no libido whatsoever and haven't had for years, I've always gone through phases of little or no libido, I think we put ourselves under to much pressure to have a good sex life all the time, I think that the quality of the sex you have is more important than the quantity. A lot of sex that leaves you feeling disatisfied and feeling that you would rather have spent the time reading a book, can't be good for you, its just another chore. I agree with BG, lot of men are really bad at sex, they have little idea of what women need sexually, they can get upset at the most gentle suggestions of how things could be different and there still seems to be a lot of prejudice about women as active sexual beings, rather than passive precipients of a mans desire. I'm sure there are many men who can and will say the same about women, that they're to passive, they get upset at the idea of certain things. But to me rather than get into a spat about who's worse, women or men, it would be much more helpful to be honest about our needs as individuals and in general.

I wonder if people finally feel comfortable enough to be truthful about the amount of sex they have?
Female
Judance  Female  Berkshire 8-May-2019 12:23 Message #4739775
I have to ask, does it actually matter?

It all seems part of this media hype that says we all have to have a perfect figure/job/family … add other relevant things .. and have an active sex life until we're 90!

Why?

I think we should be far more concerned with developing mutual respect, a loving and supportive family and care and concern for others rather than speculating about copulating.
Male
badman  Male  Suffolk 8-May-2019 12:25 Message #4739776
BunnyGirl, perhaps you didn't tell your lover what you wanted him to do with you. Some women like certain things that others don't.

Perhaps the enthusiasm wasn't there for some reason. Some women just lie there like a sack of potatoes, others actively participate and give as good as they get.

Luckily, I gravitate towards the latter.
Male
persona_non_grata  Male  North London 8-May-2019 12:39 Message #4739777
Mmmm. It depends on the potato. Fluffy and starchy? Rich and creamy? Life’s rich tapestry. I think some think too much lol. In my (meagre) experience if a couple are crazy and passionate about each other .. the sex will probably be very good.
Male
Hierophant  Male  East Anglia 8-May-2019 12:58 Message #4739778
I never understand this idea that modern life is too busy, jeez with all the labour saving devices we have more time than ever.
I agree with others that it doesn't matter how much sex you have.

As for the men are crap at sex thing, well I'm sure we can all provide examples of rubbish encounters with the opposite/same sex.
It does make me laugh when women proclaim to know all about sex but then have no idea what makes a man feel good and have no idea what to do with a penis other than handle it like a piece of garden hosepipe...
Female
Andromeda  Female  Berkshire 8-May-2019 15:38 Message #4739801
I was thinking the same Hierophant. With all the modern labour saving technology we should all have a lot more spare time but it hasn't worked out like that.
I now have a washing machine, tumble dryer, dishwasher but no more spare time. A mystery. I certainly don't have time for that hanky panky stuff.
Male
badman  Male  Suffolk 8-May-2019 16:26 Message #4739802
People will always make time for what they want to do.
Female
wonderoushen  Female  Gwynedd 8-May-2019 18:58 Message #4739823
'..handle like a piece of garden hosepipe..' that made me laugh, but I think that the sort of thing I was trying to communicate, so many people are embarressed that they don't really know what to do, we need more openess, communication and less embarassement when talking about or having sex.
Male
HonestBob  Male  the Central region 9-May-2019 10:31 Message #4739864
I saw a study type thing and it stated men who are 18-30 are having very little sex in comparison to women aged 18-30.

So it would seem young men aren't getting enough.

Me personally I do miss sex with a partner I love, but it's the price to pay for how I live my life. I certainly don't have much spare time in my life. After work I hit the gym, come home walk the dog, prepare foods to eat and for work that night, before I know it, it's 6 hours before I need to get up and start again.

"As for the men are crap at sex thing, well I'm sure we can all provide examples of rubbish encounters with the opposite/same sex."

Yes women can simply lye on their back like a chicken waiting to be flung in the oven. If the "lucky" man doesn't send her into space with a earth shattering orgasm... He is shit in bed!

We talk so much about the effects of porn on men, and how it distorts their views on sexual relations. We never discuss the issue or vibrators and sex toys! Some have said it's a much greater issue than porn. Women shove a power tool up them, and get very used to how it works... then a guy comes along and his penis doesn't vibrate, osculate or have a built in clit stimulator... he is shit in bed!

Yet, women who pulverize their vag with a large power tool, get all upset about sex dolls! The mind boggles!
Male
Hierophant  Male  East Anglia 9-May-2019 10:36 Message #4739865
"I saw a study type thing and it stated men who are 18-30 are having very little sex in comparison to women aged 18-30."

Interesting, so logically, women aged 18-30 are having sex with men over 30, wow so there's hope for me yet, that 22 year old nymphomaniac is not just a distant dream...

Male
persona_non_grata  Male  North London 9-May-2019 10:47 Message #4739866
...get all upset about sex dolls! The mind boggles!

How sad .. I will have to get rid of my inflateable doll. I will let her down gently :(
Male
HonestBob  Male  the Central region 9-May-2019 13:17 Message #4739871
"Interesting, so logically, women aged 18-30 are having sex with men over 30, wow so there's hope for me yet, that 22 year old nymphomaniac is not just a distant dream..."

Well you could be correct Hiero. When the study was discussed at length they drew two conclusions...

One was as you mentioned, younger women are banging older men at a higher rate. Younger men are being left out.

The other is the 80/20 rule! The 80/20 rule is that 80% of women, are only interested in the top 20% of men. The other 80% are getting very little. So the 18-30 year old millionaires, footballers, tall, bad boys are getting the vast majority of sex from multiple women. For example the warehouse worker who is average in looks and height, isn't getting much sex, if any. And the tall attractive son of a wealthy man, he is getting his P wet multiple times a week, by multiple different women per week.

The bottom 80% of men have to fight it out for the bottom 20% of women... hence why even the ugliest, fattest of women seem to be inundated with interest from men.

I believe it's mostly 80/20 that is the contributing factor.

If you get a 22 year old nymph... be kind and share her! Hahahaha


Back to top  Back to top

Help with conversations Help with conversations »