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A different phase.

When is a few, a lot?

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badman  Male  Suffolk 26-Dec-2017 08:22 Message #4708276
I've been reading quite a few profiles on one of those 'swipe' apps.

The phrase 'A few extra pounds' seems to be quite common (not limited to, or aimed at any particular gender) and basically, it translates to,

'Haven't been to the gym lately'.

'Actually, never been to the gym'.

'Don't know where the gym is'.

'Don't know what a gym is'.

'Is it near Greggs?'

'My floorboards creak'.

'Those stairs weren't built properly anyway'.

'That chair was already broken, honest'.

'Chairs seem to have got smaller since I was younger'.

'Sometimes need help getting off the sofa'.

'Actually, always need help getting off the sofa'.

'I don't know if I have pubic hair or not'.

'The Bed Company won't take my calls anymore'.

'Bath? Yeah right'.

I could go on, but you get the gist. So when does a few extra pounds translate to 'Can be seen from space' ?
badman  Male  Suffolk 26-Dec-2017 08:23 Message #4708277
'Phrase' even.
OnlineMSE  Male  Essex 26-Dec-2017 09:38 Message #4708278
I could go on, but you get the gist. So when does a few extra pounds translate to 'Can be seen from space' ?

When it's a few extra more than a few extra more.
wholelottakaren  Female  Lincolnshire 26-Dec-2017 10:37 Message #4708280
In the days when I used to look at profiles , I was always amused by the old men who claimed to be 50. Last time some of them saw 50 , it was on somebody's front door
Coronto  Male  Devon 26-Dec-2017 11:18 Message #4708282
I met a gal last week 'few extra pounds'

Using a wide angle lens stood 4 miles from the arranged meeting point I could clearly see her waddling down the street.

So being a gent I quickly slipped off my brogues, on with the Nikes and off home I ran.
johnlock  Male  Essex 26-Dec-2017 20:02 Message #4708287
I met someone once, she turned up on a cold day in a low cut top displaying acres of badly tattoo'd tits, arms & hands similarly disfigured. All had been photoshop'd out on her profile photo which must have been at least 10 years & nearly as many stone out of date!

Eljer  Male  North London 26-Dec-2017 20:54 Message #4708289
The ladies ive met on here are everything they say they was, they was beautiful to me, so beautiful .. ide be happy with a plain jane though ;)
Phoenixnights  Female  Nottinghamshire 26-Dec-2017 21:22 Message #4708290
Men tend to do the same about their height.

I remember meeting someone who said he was 5' 10" , but plainly wasnt , who then had a go at me because I wasnt 5' 7" as I had claimed but shorter. We were about the same height ! Go figure !!
wholelottakaren  Female  Lincolnshire 26-Dec-2017 23:12 Message #4708294
an interesting thread that proves what most of us fatties have always known , despite all the protests to the contrary. Now please, dont get me wromg: I am not going to attack anyone for having a preference, just none of this 'size isnt an issue' nonsense We all know it is. Oh, and be honest yourselves, gents.
Hierophant  Male  East Anglia 27-Dec-2017 08:10 Message #4708296
Ha ha this type of thread always makes me laugh because they always end up as a men versus women bunfight about who lies the most on profiles.
Of course we all have preferences whether it's about weight, height, smoking or non smoking, kids or no kids etc etc.
I'm always amazed how people are so sure about their own height or weight, unless they measure both regularly - I'd love to know the last time most adults had their height measured accurately...
Minnie-the-Minx  Female  Hertfordshire 27-Dec-2017 08:59 Message #4708297
Precisely so, Hiero. I am not over weight. I am merely under tall.
Bewildered  Female  Norfolk 27-Dec-2017 09:02 Message #4708298
Well I know I am 5 ft 2 in, have been all my adult life , there was an extra half inch but I have knocked that of for age shrinkage.
Weight...arrr well I can tell you exactly what I weigh every 3 days or so as I get weighed at work. Huh someone had the cheek to say I was rather weight obsessed lol

The one that gets me is smokes occasionally lol... does that mean every waking hour but not when asleep )))
Coronto  Male  Devon 27-Dec-2017 11:28 Message #4708301
Height is an issue. And I'd think the reason most me lie about it as on dating sites, you see lots of gals SHORTER than 5' 5" insisting they will only date someone over 6'

And as a 7' tall Adonis with the mature looks of Mr Clooney I'm fed up of straining my back bending down to kiss these ladies!
Although thinking about it kissing a gal on the lips isn't the done thing when you first meet them, and they are still stepping off the escalator in C&A?
Blue-Poppy  Female  East Yorkshire 27-Dec-2017 16:32 Message #4708304
What is a few pounds? Ah now you're asking Badman. Shapes and weights have changed enormously since most of us were young but we all still have the idea that 7--8 st for women and 10 -11 for men is the norm ... sadly not. I know I am the stated 'few extra pounds' but I'm ok with it and not ashamed and the weight I am feels right. I can lose these extra pounds but I'm not really happy having to think about what I do and eat all the time. As it is I eat what I want and do a lot of walking which has kept me about the same for 20 years.

BTW I love johmlock's description of his date, so few words that say so much, haha

eurostar  Female  Merseyside 27-Dec-2017 18:16 Message #4708306
when did we all become scared of the word fat???
people say all those phrases,a bit overweight,a few extra pounds etc etc...when one three letter word says it all f a t...simple...and I do think more women hide from that word than seem to be proud to strut their bellies...even when wearing speedo

I,m Eurostar and today I,m fat,,,(xmas cakes, mince pies etc)...sunday I,ll be slim again...daily 40 mile bike rides will sort gone are the days of rampant sex now I have to flippin hey a ride is a ride lol
Hierophant  Male  East Anglia 27-Dec-2017 19:07 Message #4708309
You really should put the saddle back on your bike you know...
Nigel_In_Devon  Male  Devon 27-Dec-2017 21:58 Message #4708311
Coronto..."Height is an issue. And I'd think the reason most me lie about it as on dating sites, you see lots of gals SHORTER than 5' 5" insisting they will only date someone over 6'"

No, height isn't such an issue that anyone should feel the need to lie about it. So what if some girls shorter than 5'5" specify a minimum height of 6ft for a man? Why would any bloke choose to lie? It's not as if he will be able to hide his height when they meet.
fosy  Male  Leicestershire 27-Dec-2017 22:37 Message #4708312
"Why would any bloke choose to lie? "

its in the hope that should they meet, personality will overcome the height obstacle, imo.
Eljer  Male  North London 28-Dec-2017 00:00 Message #4708315
im six foot one, and was with a lady of five foot two, for 27 years .. the only down side in bed was that i had cold feet but her toes used to keep my knees warm ;)
Minnie-the-Minx  Female  Hertfordshire 28-Dec-2017 08:04 Message #4708317
And this thread and others reminds me absolutely why I don't use the internet for dating. Not because I am afraid that someone will fib to me before I meet them, but because I got fed up with the way that everyone treats each other as a commodity and not a person with feelings. Of course, I have preferences like anyone else and I do look at men who are tall and muscly. But you know what, if I met someone in life who was fun and interesting, and I felt wonderful in his company, I wouldn't give a damn about looks.
They say that people remember how you made them feel, not how you look, and I think that is true.
I can't make my mind up whether there are some awfully shallow people on this site, or whether they aren't really looking, they put so many obstacles in the way of finding someone.
Helenuk1963  Female  Gloucestershire 28-Dec-2017 10:54 Message #4708324
This is an interesting thread. When I joined here I was looking for a tall, dark haired , blue-eyed smoker who lived locally. I met up with someone who lived over 100 miles away who was looking for a slim, dark-haired ,petite non-smoker as we had a common interest in similar music. I'm tall, blonde and not at all slim, he's around my height and not dark-haired and was absolutely anti smoking ! We'll have been married 6 years in June. There was no instant ' spark ' and certainly no love at first sight, but we hit it off as friends and got to know each other and here we are.
wholelottakaren  Female  Lincolnshire 28-Dec-2017 14:28 Message #4708331
Absolutely Minnie. that was probably the main reason I gave up too. I am not a product in the Argos catalogue. I will be judged by people who know and meet me in the flesh.
barney  Male  Surrey 28-Dec-2017 16:47 Message #4708335
I think Helenuk is a perfect example of how dating should be.
Forget all the tick lists, just go with the flow and see how it all pans out.
You are never going to find the perfect match as we all have imperfections, that's half the fun and anyway who really wants Mr or miss/Mrs perfect they are probably a nightmare to live with.
We all change over the years, gain a few pounds become set in our ways but we do become older and wiser and know we have to compromise on some things or some of us do.
JEM95  Female  Oxfordshire 28-Dec-2017 20:49 Message #4708353
Oh heck! I have “few extra pounds” on my profile (not this one, a proper dating site one). Guess I selected it as there wasn’t a ‘podgy’ or ‘corpulent’ option - ha ha!

I’m quite a lot of pounds less than I was this time last year (30 plus) but I still think I fall into the “few extra pounds” category.

And no, it wasn’t me meeting Coronto :-)
Cassis  Female  Cambridgeshire 29-Dec-2017 02:53 Message #4708364
I agree wholeheartedly with most of what you said. I totally drew a line under online dating a while ago this year for the reason you gave - that the majority of people using them treat others as a commodity and very disposable ones at that. I just couldn't be a part of that whole circus anymore and would never be so again. I got on with enjoying life single again, and have met my current man the old-fashioned way when I wasn't even thinking about it.
It's also absolutely true, for me at least, that though I have perceived preferences and want to feel physical attraction if it's to be a boyfriend/girlfriend thing, when it comes down to it the real chemistry is in the connection between their personality and mine. I'm hopeless at height perception anyway...I'm constantly thinking I'm the same height as someone I'm with who turns out to be 6ft +
As for men's weights in relation to their physical appearance - I've no idea! I just know when I see them if they look reasonably in shape as I tend to be put off by obesity. I certainly don't want a gym fanatic - those eight packs look so uncomfortable in terms of snuggling up.

Agree with you, too - the boyfriends I've had who conform to my "ideal" have seldom been the ones I've really fallen for...again it's been qualities like kindness and humour, and the unaccountable joy I feel in their company that captures my attention. I've seen the same with friends, and many "chalk and cheese" relationships there.

I think that music is one helluva matchmaker! When I meet someone who "gets" what I "get" musically, it has often been the start of something special. That's happened to me twice just this year. Mind you, coming back to online profiles, punters often lie about that too! They say they like whatever might make them seem cool/young/clever/interesting/whatever:)

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